1. Think of my Masters happiness in every interaction,
2. i will always be direct but polite,
3. my Masters happiness is my happiness and;
4. my capacity to serve my Master is my responsibility.
Hello, I am casilla, registered slave number 112-891-934 and this is my journey into submission.
I like to believe that everyone has a purpose in life. Wether your purpose is to grow up and be an astronaut, president, be married with kids and a white picket fence, I believe everyone has a purpose.
Before I met my Master, I began to lose my purpose and identity. Without going into too much detail about my life as I believe some of this may be a trigger for people, my Master gave me a purpose. He has taught me the importance of self value, self worth and love. He has taught me that as his property and his most prized possession that I no longer have that right to give up hope.
My purpose is to serve my Master. To see his growth and happiness in every single way. He is the first thing on my mind when I wake up, throughout the day and the last thing on my mind when I sleep.
It hasn’t been easy for Him, I have been defiant, bratty, rude even and he still persevered with pursuing and maintaining the connection we had built before going down the road of the M/s dynamic. But these are the things I appreciate the most. His strength and clarity. His loving arms and warm heart. His smile and laugh as he watches his favourite show.
In the beginning he would tell me over and over and over again (assertive ofcourse) that a slave should take great pleasure in being subservient, be it domestic chores, physical interactions. I always knew that being a slave was what I wanted, so I went along with it not happy at all about having to do such mundane things and enjoy it. I would show this great displeasure verbally, physically and mentally.
I mean come on, who in their right mind would take pleasure in serving some one else, right? I was and still am an independent, strong woman but until the dynamic shift in me changed, until I was ready and through the guideance and strength of my Master, my journey into submission has only just begun.
I had the opportunity to seek my Masters approval to pursue poly relations. He would vett them and then if he saw fit we would play. Long story short our M/s dynamic was strained due to my inability to understand, cooperate or even be submissive, so I took it on myself to set up a date without Master vetting. He knew about the person, but by that stage I was already rogue and not abiding by his rules for my own selfish purposes. I pursed my own desires.
My freewill and stupidity got me into a world of hurt regarding an instance where my consent was breached and broken with a stranger and was no longer my choice. I felt crushed and sick.
The first person I turned to was my Master, though I did not tell him what happened I went running straight into his arms and after a day of gently probing what was wrong with his slave, I broke and told the truth.
I’m not going to lie, the reaction surrounding non consent and or broken consent is fucking difficult. We were both in shock and after the initial shock wore off, my Master held me in his arms. I sobbed, I mourned and felt sick with anxiety. He held me in his arms and told me that I am his most prized possession.
I felt the shift in me in that moment. All of a sudden my worries didn’t matter any more. My love had deepened from being selfish to being selfless. Suddenly my deep gratitude for my Master, for our M/s dynamic was the only thing that gave me purpose. I wanted to serve him.
All of a sudden, his needs and his desires, were so much more important then mine. I have found my Master. Today I do domestic chores, not because I have to but because I genuinely want too and I take great pleasure in this.
I believe that once we find our purpose, a higher purpose then your life becomes so much more fulfilling and enriched. I found mine.